My maiden brunch at News Café
“So you haven’t been to the News Cafés?” a colleague asked. “I’m astonished.” PHOTO|JOHN FOX
- Contact with the employers was minimal. But minimal contact with a driver would have been nigh unlikely.
- You just couldn’t travel for hours on end in the capsule of a car without talking. And that’s the kind of contact that would have shown how nonsensical apartheid was. Anyway, that’s just a theory.
- Another thing I recall about my visits to Pretoria was that I never spotted one mixed duo. It was, and in so many ways, different from our cosmopolitan, more liberal and relaxed Nairobi.
“So you haven’t been to the News Cafés?” a colleague asked. “I’m astonished.”
So I went. Last Sunday for a brunch. At one of the three News Cafés in Nairobi – the one in the Adlife Plaza of Kilimani. (The others are at the Sarit Centre and in Hardy Estate, Karen.)
But I knew the News Café brand from a few visits to the one in the Hatfield district of Pretoria (now Tshwane), when I was on consultancy in South Africa. That was the very first of them, opened about two decades ago.
What I recall is that all the waiters were white. Even the parking boys were white. But that was Hatfield. You wouldn’t have known the apartheid regime had crumbled a few years back.
One thing I noticed was that no-one employed a driver. It seemed that, however white households employed cooks, cleaners and gardeners, they didn’t take on drivers. It occurred to me that employing cooks, cleaners and gardeners must have been no challenge to sustaining the separation culture of apartheid. They would be left alone to get on with their jobs, and at the end of the day they would travel out on the workers’ trains to the Mamelodi township.
Contact with the employers was minimal. But minimal contact with a driver would have been nigh unlikely. You just couldn’t travel for hours on end in the capsule of a car without talking. And that’s the kind of contact that would have shown how nonsensical apartheid was. Anyway, that’s just a theory.
PREMIUM ENTERTAINMENT Practice
Another thing I recall about my visits to Pretoria was that I never spotted one mixed duo. It was, and in so many ways, different from our cosmopolitan, more liberal and relaxed Nairobi.
And having myself just piled up three adjectives, I’m tempted to have a go at the very worst kind of PR-speak from the News Café website. Have a read of this:
“News Café offers and facilitates a premium entertainment practice for its aspirational customer base by efficiently serving world class food offerings and premier beverage choices in an atmosphere that is contemporary, vibrant and relevant.” And so it goes on.
Does anyone love, never mind believe, this kind of off-the peg hype? And does the News Café in Kilimani live up to it?
I’m not sure what a “premium entertainment experience” a restaurant is supposed to give. It was a Sunday morning, so you wouldn’t expect a DJ or a cabaret, but there were TV screens set up on the walls showcasing, yes, SuperSport channels.
As for the “customer base” I couldn’t tell whether they were “aspirational” but they seemed a fairly typical mix of youngish Nairobians, out for a late Sunday breakfast or early lunch. I couldn’t decently appraise the “premier beverage choices” because it was too early for that. But I understand that the broad range of cocktails is a News Café speciality.
However, I can say something about the “world class food offerings.” I sampled the English Breakfast. I can’t say it was world class because the French fries were coldish and hard – and the eggs were hard-Kenyan not soft-English style. But it was a nice touch to suggest a choice of streaky or back bacon. The coffee was OK, too.
I should say, the menu is very extensive – from ten kinds of burger to seven different wraps – as well as salads, steaks, grills and all-day breakfasts. For socialising over a meal there is the “top seller” platter, with a total portion of bbq ribs, chicken wings, sausages, served with Cajun potato wedges. It serves up to four people for Sh4,500.
Why are these places called News Cafés? In the Kabalagala district in Kampala there used to be a bar called Telex – a place bombed by terrorists back in 1999. I was told that, during the times of civil strife under Idi Amin, it was the place where you went to find out what was going on. In Nairobi, I understand, the place for news (or well-informed gossip) used to be the nyama choma joints of Kenyatta Market.
The News Café in Hatfield had blown-up newsprint on the walls. I didn’t see any similar media stuff on display in the Kilimani News Café. But the décor is cheerful. I guess it is worth the label “contemporary’ however “vibrant’ might be too strong a word. As for “relevant” – I’ve no idea to what it is supposed to be relevant.
To be fair, maybe I should attempt this place in the evening, when it is utter of its aspirational customer base and I can attempt a duo of its cocktails to make myself more vibrant. Tho’ I guess I might still not be relevant.
John Fox is Managing Director of iDC